Therapeutic RelationshipUnderstanding the Massage Therapist/Client RelationshipThe Therapeutic Relationship concept is often a difficult concept for massage therapists to comprehend. It happens whether you are aware of it or not. It is usually only briefly talked about in massage school when really it could be a full year of training and more. The therapeutic relationship is a special and very different type of relationship that occurs between a massage therapist and client. The one and only focus of the relationship is on the client and every aspect that they bring into the massage room and place on the massage table. Because relationship dynamics are often filled with unconscious patterns and the massage therapist also brings with them into their practice their whole life history, it is important that the massage therapist understand this process and constantly be studying it. People who are seeking massage for whatever reason are looking for help for their situation. The massage therapist has more training and knowledge of the body and muscles than the potential client. From the moment a person begins even thinking about seeking out a massage therapist, the therapeutic relationship begins and the dynamics of such relationship can start occurring. People will look up to the massage therapist and look to them for help. This dynamic is called the power differential and it occurs in every therapeutic relationship. More simply put it is when the massage client unconsciously looks to the massage therapist as being a parent figure which has the potential to create all of the dynamics that go along with those past relationships. The client will transfer their old feelings in those past relationships onto the massage therapist thinking that it is the massage therapist that is the reason for the feelings. It is an unconscious process for the most part meaning people don't really have any awareness that they are doing it and it does all seem very real to them. The fact that people seek out massage therapists when they are in pain and under stress will exacerbate the dynamics. The fact that people also are in a semi-state of undress leaves them further vulnerable to the dynamics of transference or reacting to the power imbalance that is created. Some of the signs of transference are things like:
The thing is that these things just seem like everyday occurrences. When clients do these things it doesn't mean it is bad or that you need to end the relationship for them. These feelings that go along with those sort of actions are actually the place where more deeper healing can occur in people. When someone is transferring their feelings onto you, the best way to deal with them is to know your boundaries around the many issues that arise. There will always be new situations arising for you to look at throughout your career as a massage therapist. That is where the process of supervision will come in. (See supervision section.) You create your boundaries by having clear policies and procedures for running your business and also a clear image of who your ideal client is. In having clear boundaries, it allows you to make decisions for your business that support you in your success and also provide for the clients well being. When clients are transferring their old emotions onto you it is having clear boundaries that will actually help them heal their old wounds/self limiting beliefs and deeper parts of themselves. Of course we are not psychologists and are not doing psychological therapy which brings and even greater need for boundaries. Boundaries sometimes get massage therapists confused. They are not barriers but they are more of a protective seal. Since the main focus of the relationship is the client, it is important to take a close look at your own personal needs and values and get them met outside of the massage interaction. These unmet needs will show up in different ways when working with clients and will influence the work you do with clients. Often massage therapists are not aware of their own needs and also will have feelings of wanting/needing to be more personal or friends with clients. Our work is different from any other type of work or healing work in that we do have the opportunity to get to know people in very different ways. It is only common that we often feel the need to reciprocate and share our own stories and lives with clients. But what happens in all relationships is that there are two sides to the story and massage therapists can themselves transfer their emotions onto clients. This is called counter-transference. It is just about everything that the massage therapist brings into their practice. Some common signs of counter-transference are things like:
Again countertransference is not to be avoided. It is what it is- a common part of relationships (every relationship just like transference!) The issue though lies in the massage therapists ability to keep the session focused on the client under various circumstances and learn to deeply listen to clients. It is a vital part of the healing process of both the client and the massage therapist. Knowing your values and beliefs and putting them into boundaries is what will help you to be able to keep your focus on the client and help you to focus on your own needs outside of the massage session. When you make self care a priority for yourself, your client will see that and know that from your interactions and use you as an example for themselves. Setting boundaries again is what allow the therapeutic relationship to occur as safely as possible and allow both parties to learn and heal. See also:Boundaries for Massage Therapists Therapeutic Relationship resources, articles and books Start Your own peer Group Share your information on this topicVoice your information, opinion, comments or story on this topic. Become a Massage Therapist || Find or Create Your Ideal Massage Job Websites || Supervision || FAQ's || About Me |
